Negus the dragon

Negus the dragon

Tuesday, April 29, 2014

A backwards life

Everything is backwards. 
It breaks my heart.
My life is upside down.
I am so busy and preoccupied
With my ultimate goal
And my son looks for my attention
Getting in my face 
during important phone calls
Or while I am applying for 
A job or an apartment 
But I am trying to 
Get things done
Achieve a goal
So I put my hand in his face 
When I am on the phone
I tell him "No"
I cannot watch him
Do that trick
Or dance that dance
I am too busy
But I see the future.
I am desperate 
For my boy's attention
I want him to look at me
spend time with me
Maybe play a game of charades 
Or maybe watch a movie
But he is on the phone 
With his girlfriend 
Or a college admission office
And he is putting his hand 
up in my face
Telling me to go away
That he is to busy
And he is trying 
To accomplish something 
It will break my heart
All over again
Right now, I want 
Nothing more
Than to no longer be
Too busy 
Consumed by my goal
And to just be able to 
Not ever put my hand
In his face and tell him no
I just want to tell him 
Yes
And live right now.


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